if.

if i didn't see you tomorrow
if tomorrow i was gone
i'm not sure what i should tell you
i know that i should say
that its alright its okay
that it was my time
and how time flies
when youre having fun
but i'm not sure if these fingers could do that
if i could turn my back and say
its laright its okay
part of me knows
that i am a child of this earth
my toes grip this dirt
and i cannot let go
i'm a fighter.
they'll tell you that
those men in white coats
with the dragged down skin
around their eyes and mouths
the skin stretched by hours of reaching
to catch these flailing hands
they'll say she is a ..
no they'll say was.
she fought hard.
and thats how you'll know
that dangerous little twist of the tongue
that drives yesterday from today
that leaves space empty
space i used to take
but if it comes to taht
i don't know what i'd want to say
i'd say i love you
that you made me
who i was
but that the parts of me
taht were only me are gone now
not to worry what you gave me
nothing can take that away
so they'll return
with the scent of me to keep you warm
those thoughts and sayings
the time we spent together
i gave you them
you gave them to me
and thats going to last forever

so if now is my last today
this is what i'd want to say.

i love you. i need you. it will be okay.
the past is for the future.
its my gift for you this way.
be strong. be happy. and don't forget to say
i love you.

it will be okay.