Autopsy Report.

never knew it would feel like this
like my fingers are broken
long flower stems
snapped
left hanging
on green shreds of skin
limp and loose
lumps that are useless
hard throbs of pain

never knew that it would feel like this
like my feet are gone
lost from the ankles
tree roots dug away
abandoned
rotted clear out and empty
shell-like nubs of hollow mold
meaningless
holding nothing up

i never knew that it would feel like this
like a shattered spine
paralyzed
lightning struck
can bud no more
left a gigantic scar
across the horizon
a flagrant warning to what comes
of stretching high

i never knew that it would feel like this
to be helpless
and to love
which of these crimes is worst
one begets the other
to love
is to give hostages to fate
to be helpless is to learn to love
and this is me
no hands no feet no tongue
split and silenced
by the horror that is helplessness
to a heart who loves

Call it a crime
and call me convicted
but still i swear
i never knew that it would feel this way
to be helpless. and in love.