doctor please

i've tried everything.

ridiculous really

if i pulled out the lists and lists

the encyclopedias and dictionaries

of how i have tried

of how i've pushed

of how i've...

how i've failed

to keep you out

to stay safe and solid and secure

i've used those chain locks

the ones they wrap in rubber

as if to make them softer

less of an attack

on public trust and truth and decency

i've hung the padlocks

with the spinning wheels

secret codes and combinations

to keep mysteries and possibilities

encrypted in this crypt

wore necklaces and rings

with sharp edges and careless points

so doublesided and cruel

keeping pain as the last tool

between me and between you

ive done what i could

dug trenches

build walls

created ironsided safes

and locked myself inside

i've asked hard questions

thrown sharp fears

used words like weapons

flint edged spears

and oh how i've tried 

to keep these forces apart

someone told me once 

the only cure for love

was a broken heart.